last stand
This morning I said good-bye to the church that has been my home church for three years. I have been on the verge of tears all day. I have been distracting myself enough that I don't break down, but it's hard. I will miss so many people that have become such a big part of my life it makes me so sad. I love this community. I love summer sundays and lunches after church. I love Saturday afternoon worship team practices. I love that it's freezing in the winter and sizzling in the summer. I love the ambulances that always seem to pass by during communion time. I love the hugs and smiles and warmth and love that so many people have lavished upon me. I love the support that I have gotten during these difficult, confusing, and often frustrating three years. I love that I got to give back to something and see the difference that it made. I love this church and the people that go here and I will miss it more than I can say. This community is unlike any that I have ever been involved with and that is so precious to me. I am sorry that I didn't appreciate it more and that often times my life frustrations distracted me. However, I will never forget this amazing place and the people that make it so alive. God bless you all as you continue to grow and reach out to those around you. May God give you wisdom, peace and joy always. May he guide your decisions and be ever present through your lives. I will miss you, but may we see each other again soon!
posted by Juliet at
9:36 PM
2 Comments:
Do you really not know what you've got until it's gone...or going away? Or do you only truly understand it most when you're not losing it, but having to be the one walking away from the church and the community that you've come to know, understand, and love?
It takes balls (excuse me) to be the one to walk away. You know it's God's will, right? But you can still be taking those steps and saying, "Damnit, I know that I still NEED to be at a place like that." And it's not just your need either. That place can benefit from the coffee poured, the data entered on spreadsheets, emails sent, communion cups filled (well, when there is money enough to have actual individual cups as opposed to a communal chalice), kids babysat, etc. It's even harder when you know that you contribute to (while getting so much). And why on earth does it cease to be the thing you know that is God's will for your life...even though you still make a wonderful, positive impact there...and the church still impacts you?
I can't say that the questions will become easier. I also can't say that it's replaceable because it's not. And I also can't say that you won't long for the people, community, and experience so unique. And you know, even when you're following what you know is God's will, sometimes you don't get the instant family that you're leaving now.
I'm glad He knows better than we do. I'm still sorting. Take the past three years with you,...and hold them tight while at the same time, continuing to find the way to let go to find what lies beyond the logistics you already know are God's plan.
By
Anonymous, at 10:29 PM
Don't forget where you've come from and what you've experienced, but don't let it keep you from seeing, doing, and experiencing new things in Miami. God has great things for you if you will turn to him and really, truly live for him.
Oh, and speaking on behalf of UCC, we'll miss you too. You've worked your butt off and done a lot of great things, and we appreciate it. :)
Don't forget to write! (e-mail or snail mail)
-Matt
By
Anonymous, at 11:27 AM
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